http://fourstateshomepage.com/life/family-first
Hi friends,
Tammy and I hope this finds you, all, well and your relationships growing and healthy.
In case you missed it, KSN TV did a news article about Motive Matters and The Color Code during the 10:00 O'clock edition. You can see the article by clicking on the above link. (It is 2 minutes and 13 seconds long.)
We wish to give kudos to Wendell and Maura, and to Anchor, Toni Valliere, and Camera Man, Eric, for their fine work. Thank you KSN TV for promoting family values and healthy relationships on "The Hometown News at 10"!
Keep learning, stretching, growing, and serving.
Have a great day, great relationships, and a great life:) !
Wednesday, May 4, 2011
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
2011 Valentine Weekend Retreat in Branson
Visit our website www.MotiveMatters.com for details and registration
for our exciting Valentine Weekend Retreat!
This year we have chosen to host our retreat at the fabulous Chateau on the Lake in Branson, Missouri! You will love the beautiful rooms overlooking Table Rock Lake. This is an amazing 4 star facility and will prove to be a fun, informative and memorable weekend that will strengthen your marriage and leave you with lasting memories of a special Valentine with your special Valentine!
Dr. Taylor Hartman, creator of The Color Code will be joining us for the weekend, presenting our keynote address on Saturday evening, following a romantic dinner, to end a great day of Motive!
Van and Tammy Benson will be training a more in depth module on The Color Code, along with fresh new information and videos you will enjoy, and find a valuable addition to your Motive knowledge.
Due to sponsorship by the Miami Tribe of Oklahoma and Motive Matters, this is an opportunity for you to take part in world class training and hear internationally famous and best selling author, Dr. Hartman speak on the topic that is near and dear to all of us....our marriages and families. Don't miss this rare opportunity! The price is reasonable and includes 2 nights stay and meals for you both on Saturday and Sunday morning.
We are going to have a GREAT time, being together and learning together!
See you there! Space is limited! Register now at www.MotiveMatters.com
Our best to you!
Van and Tammy
Monday, October 18, 2010
Motive Matters Training Update
It is such a joy, pleasure, and privilege to share life with so many of you.
Our lives have been enriched by all the wonderful people who participate in our workshops. Thank you so much!
To all who joined us this past weekend at the Hilton Garden Inn we want to give you a word of encouragement. You guys were a GREAT group!
Remember...it is Continuous SELF Improvement. Apply your new knowledge of Motive Matters and The Color Code making use of the gifts of humility, courage, and grace. Move forward with gentle but sure steps. Don't try to fix everything instantly. Learn to enjoy the journey. Be patient with yourself and your mate.
Be reminded how special and important you are. There are people in your life who are waiting for you to take the first steps. You can do this.
Refuse to allow "perfection" to thwart improvement within yourself. Never expect perfection from your mate. You married a fallible human being, and by the way, so did your spouse. Let patience have it's perfect work.
Tammy and I will be continually thinking of you and lifting you up. Call on us if you need help.
LOVE - "Extending one's self for one's own, or anothers, spiritual growth. (M. Scott Peck)
We love you guys! Hope you have a blessed day. May the very best of life be yours. Life is all about relationships.
Van Benson, President, Motive Matters
Thursday, August 19, 2010
Motive Matters - Change Your World View! by Van Benson
Everyone has a world view.
Dr. Henry T. Close writes in his book Metaphor in Psychotherapy, "World views are formed gradually from the moments of birth, by the untold thousands of experiences a person has in life.
Dr. Taylor Hartman writes in his book, The People Code, "Red, Blue, White, or Yellow, (Power, Intimacy, Peace, or Fun) everyone is motivated by an internal driving core personality that completely colors how he or she views and experiences life."
So, which is it?
Is our world view determined by our driving core motive, or by our life experiences?
Is it nature, or nurture?
It is both.
I have an important question for you, however.
Which comes first? (Ponder this for a moment.)
In Motive Theory, we teach that we all came here with an innate personality. We had it before we took our first breath. Ask any woman who has carried more than one child in the womb. They will inform you they could tell a difference in those kids, in the womb!
Amazing.
Motive is an innermost impulse to action.
So, what comes first, the action, or the impulse (the motive)?
The answer is, the impulse, the motive. (True, many times the impulse is not recognizable to the conscious mind. The action may be almost instantaneous, a result of the workings of the amygdala, the emotional control center of the brain. When you are startled by an unexpected sound you may physically react in as little as 30/1000 of a second.)
The word motive, and the word emotion, come from the same root word which means "to move". For this reason, if we are to understand why we do what we do, and why we see our world the way we do, we must understand the core motive which drives our personalities.
In my experience, I have found that my core motive of "Fun" operates, for the most part, in my subconscious. I am not aware of it's force which exerts itself upon my thoughts, my attitudes, or even my behaviors. This is why Motive Matters training in The Color Code is so valuable, important, and life changing. Through training, I gain knowledge which provides the power of awareness. When I am aware of my motives, I am much better equipped to control and manage them. I can begin to live emotionally intelligent, rather than just operating in my automatic mode. This is what we call personal power.
Color Code training goes right to the heart of the matter of my personality, and my world view.
I see the world through "Yellow" glasses. If I am not enjoying life, what is the use? I can do certain things, which are required, such as working, studying, concentrating, but if too much time goes by, without something, about what I am doing, being FUN, I will lose interest and focus. If I am forced to continue, over an extended period of time, doing something that is no fun at all, I can build up a lot of inner turmoil, even anger. I will seek escape.
Reds are so different in the way they see life. They see through RED glasses. Motivated by "Power", if they are not moving from A to B, being productive, and getting things done, they are not happy campers.
Whites are motivated by Peace. They seek an inner sense of calm and tranquility, avoiding conflict at all cost. Without peace, life is no good.
And, our Blues are driven by Intimacy, deep, close, personal, trusting connections of the heart. A life without purpose, and deep connections is no life at all. That's the way they see the world.
We see the world differently, don't we?
Well.............who is right?
I can hear all of you, in all your different perspectives and colors saying in unison, "I am!" (Especially you Reds! :)
Our world views tend to be self validating. We are not very objective when it comes to our world view. We look for, and seek out, people, situations, circumstances, knowledge, that will confirm, or validate "OUR" world view. Because of this tendancy, our world view often becomes a "self-fulfilling prophecy". As Dr. Close puts it, "If I think people don't like me, I may tend to be less socially engaging. This may result in my having few close friends. Therefore, my world view must be right. I am not very likeable."
Is the world view correct in the afore mentioned example? Is it based in truth? Is it reality?
When Tammy and I conduct Motive Matters seminars, we always tell our audience, "This training will change your life. You will never see yourself, or anyone else the same." When we return to train a group, or a team, for the second or third time, I always ask them whether they have seen any changes in their thoughts, attitudes or perspectives. With very few exceptions, the answer is always a resounding yes.
Reds tell of how they are becoming more sensitive to the feelings of others. Blues tell of learning to overcome their unrealistic expectations. Whites say, "I am learning to be more social, to speak up." And Yellows are so proud that they are beginning to be more focused and organized.
These changes come from shifts in world view. I know of no other tool, in the field of personality, which helps people to understand and value each other more effectively, than Motive Matters, and The Color Code. Blue Tammy calls the process "The healing power of understanding." This healing often is the result of either a conscious or unconscious change of world view.
I have an idea, for a great change of world view, I would like for you to consider.
"Life is all about relationships!"
Yes, people are different. We are motivated by different impulses. Our differences are a good thing. Our differences were never meant to confound or confuse us, but to remind us of an important truth. We were always meant to be a TEAM!
We need each other.
Now, that's what I call a "New and Improved" world view!
Make plans to attend a Motive Matters training. Our next one is in Miami OK on August 28th from 10:00 A.M. to 5:00 P.M. This seminar is almost filled to capacity, so make your reservations soon, or get on the notification list for upcoming events. You can do so by sending an email to tammy@motivematters.com.
Have a great day...and a great world view! :)
I
Dr. Henry T. Close writes in his book Metaphor in Psychotherapy, "World views are formed gradually from the moments of birth, by the untold thousands of experiences a person has in life.
Dr. Taylor Hartman writes in his book, The People Code, "Red, Blue, White, or Yellow, (Power, Intimacy, Peace, or Fun) everyone is motivated by an internal driving core personality that completely colors how he or she views and experiences life."
So, which is it?
Is our world view determined by our driving core motive, or by our life experiences?
Is it nature, or nurture?
It is both.
I have an important question for you, however.
Which comes first? (Ponder this for a moment.)
In Motive Theory, we teach that we all came here with an innate personality. We had it before we took our first breath. Ask any woman who has carried more than one child in the womb. They will inform you they could tell a difference in those kids, in the womb!
Amazing.
Motive is an innermost impulse to action.
So, what comes first, the action, or the impulse (the motive)?
The answer is, the impulse, the motive. (True, many times the impulse is not recognizable to the conscious mind. The action may be almost instantaneous, a result of the workings of the amygdala, the emotional control center of the brain. When you are startled by an unexpected sound you may physically react in as little as 30/1000 of a second.)
The word motive, and the word emotion, come from the same root word which means "to move". For this reason, if we are to understand why we do what we do, and why we see our world the way we do, we must understand the core motive which drives our personalities.
In my experience, I have found that my core motive of "Fun" operates, for the most part, in my subconscious. I am not aware of it's force which exerts itself upon my thoughts, my attitudes, or even my behaviors. This is why Motive Matters training in The Color Code is so valuable, important, and life changing. Through training, I gain knowledge which provides the power of awareness. When I am aware of my motives, I am much better equipped to control and manage them. I can begin to live emotionally intelligent, rather than just operating in my automatic mode. This is what we call personal power.
Color Code training goes right to the heart of the matter of my personality, and my world view.
I see the world through "Yellow" glasses. If I am not enjoying life, what is the use? I can do certain things, which are required, such as working, studying, concentrating, but if too much time goes by, without something, about what I am doing, being FUN, I will lose interest and focus. If I am forced to continue, over an extended period of time, doing something that is no fun at all, I can build up a lot of inner turmoil, even anger. I will seek escape.
Reds are so different in the way they see life. They see through RED glasses. Motivated by "Power", if they are not moving from A to B, being productive, and getting things done, they are not happy campers.
Whites are motivated by Peace. They seek an inner sense of calm and tranquility, avoiding conflict at all cost. Without peace, life is no good.
And, our Blues are driven by Intimacy, deep, close, personal, trusting connections of the heart. A life without purpose, and deep connections is no life at all. That's the way they see the world.
We see the world differently, don't we?
Well.............who is right?
I can hear all of you, in all your different perspectives and colors saying in unison, "I am!" (Especially you Reds! :)
Our world views tend to be self validating. We are not very objective when it comes to our world view. We look for, and seek out, people, situations, circumstances, knowledge, that will confirm, or validate "OUR" world view. Because of this tendancy, our world view often becomes a "self-fulfilling prophecy". As Dr. Close puts it, "If I think people don't like me, I may tend to be less socially engaging. This may result in my having few close friends. Therefore, my world view must be right. I am not very likeable."
Is the world view correct in the afore mentioned example? Is it based in truth? Is it reality?
When Tammy and I conduct Motive Matters seminars, we always tell our audience, "This training will change your life. You will never see yourself, or anyone else the same." When we return to train a group, or a team, for the second or third time, I always ask them whether they have seen any changes in their thoughts, attitudes or perspectives. With very few exceptions, the answer is always a resounding yes.
Reds tell of how they are becoming more sensitive to the feelings of others. Blues tell of learning to overcome their unrealistic expectations. Whites say, "I am learning to be more social, to speak up." And Yellows are so proud that they are beginning to be more focused and organized.
These changes come from shifts in world view. I know of no other tool, in the field of personality, which helps people to understand and value each other more effectively, than Motive Matters, and The Color Code. Blue Tammy calls the process "The healing power of understanding." This healing often is the result of either a conscious or unconscious change of world view.
I have an idea, for a great change of world view, I would like for you to consider.
"Life is all about relationships!"
Yes, people are different. We are motivated by different impulses. Our differences are a good thing. Our differences were never meant to confound or confuse us, but to remind us of an important truth. We were always meant to be a TEAM!
We need each other.
Now, that's what I call a "New and Improved" world view!
Make plans to attend a Motive Matters training. Our next one is in Miami OK on August 28th from 10:00 A.M. to 5:00 P.M. This seminar is almost filled to capacity, so make your reservations soon, or get on the notification list for upcoming events. You can do so by sending an email to tammy@motivematters.com.
Have a great day...and a great world view! :)
I
Sunday, August 8, 2010
How Does This Work? -Van Benson, Motive Matters, Color Code
Hi friends,
Tammy and I have met so many great and wonderful people during the past several months. I can't tell you all how much I appreciate and value the time we spend together learning about Motive. A more correct way to put that would be, how we are learning about ourselves and each other, about people. What could be more important? ...(I will let you think about that one...)
We just returned home from Frankfort KY, after a Motive Matters, Color Code training with 42 teachers and administration at Frankfort Christian Academy. What a COOL school! They have a beautiful facility, a former T-shirt factory, which they converted, through much love and hard work, for a much higher higher purpose. We were privileged to get to meet, and interact, with the people who make it their life and ministry to educate the next generation of young people from in and around their city. Thank you to Paul and Linda Simms and the entire staff of FCA for making our training day a success.
We laughed, we cried, we pondered, we considered,...we learned!
On our flight home from Louisville to Tulsa, aboard the great Southwest Airlines, (I am a raving fan of theirs) I read an article in Spirit Magazine, written by Keith Runnels, a supervisor, Aircraft Maintenance, Dallas.
"Keith realized early on he could turn his tinkering habit into a career. As a little boy, one of his family's friends worked as an aviation mechanic. One weekend my Dad brought home a motorcycle in a box", Keith says. "He'd actually brought it home in pieces. Hank, the mechanic, told my Dad to take us out for the weekend, and when we got back home, he had put the entire motorcycle together!"
This impressive feat stuck in Keith's mind for years. He describes working as a mechanic for Southwest Airlines as, "the pinnacle of my career."
As a Maintenance Supervisor, his favorite question is, "How does this work?" Great question! Then he got me! He writes, "I found this applies to my fellow workers, as well as to airplanes.
He is right.
It is so helpful to know how people work. What makes them tick? What is the MOTIVE that MATTERS to them? Teachers love to learn what motivates their students as well as what motivates themselves, personally. Soooo helpful.
No matter what your profession; teacher, doctor, policeman, factory worker, manager, executive, knowing and understanding people is at the heart of your ability to be successful in life. Learning to value all people, regardless of personality differences, learning to "speak their language", and serve their emotional and psychological needs, creates trust and high performance teamwork. As Dr. Taylor Hartman says, "Life is all about Relationships!"
This month alone we will be training over 350 teachers about how Motive Matters in relationships. We hope our time together will result in knowledge and understanding that will help these teachers learn to VALUE, RESPECT, and MOTIVATE their students in a new and powerful way, bringing out the very best in all.
Let's all continue, as Dr. W. Edwards Deming said, to have a "yearnin' for learnin'." Let's keep stretching, growing, extending ourselves, for our own personal growth, and for the growth and benefit of others.
Very best of living to all. GO TEAM!
Tammy and I have met so many great and wonderful people during the past several months. I can't tell you all how much I appreciate and value the time we spend together learning about Motive. A more correct way to put that would be, how we are learning about ourselves and each other, about people. What could be more important? ...(I will let you think about that one...)
We just returned home from Frankfort KY, after a Motive Matters, Color Code training with 42 teachers and administration at Frankfort Christian Academy. What a COOL school! They have a beautiful facility, a former T-shirt factory, which they converted, through much love and hard work, for a much higher higher purpose. We were privileged to get to meet, and interact, with the people who make it their life and ministry to educate the next generation of young people from in and around their city. Thank you to Paul and Linda Simms and the entire staff of FCA for making our training day a success.
We laughed, we cried, we pondered, we considered,...we learned!
On our flight home from Louisville to Tulsa, aboard the great Southwest Airlines, (I am a raving fan of theirs) I read an article in Spirit Magazine, written by Keith Runnels, a supervisor, Aircraft Maintenance, Dallas.
"Keith realized early on he could turn his tinkering habit into a career. As a little boy, one of his family's friends worked as an aviation mechanic. One weekend my Dad brought home a motorcycle in a box", Keith says. "He'd actually brought it home in pieces. Hank, the mechanic, told my Dad to take us out for the weekend, and when we got back home, he had put the entire motorcycle together!"
This impressive feat stuck in Keith's mind for years. He describes working as a mechanic for Southwest Airlines as, "the pinnacle of my career."
As a Maintenance Supervisor, his favorite question is, "How does this work?" Great question! Then he got me! He writes, "I found this applies to my fellow workers, as well as to airplanes.
He is right.
It is so helpful to know how people work. What makes them tick? What is the MOTIVE that MATTERS to them? Teachers love to learn what motivates their students as well as what motivates themselves, personally. Soooo helpful.
No matter what your profession; teacher, doctor, policeman, factory worker, manager, executive, knowing and understanding people is at the heart of your ability to be successful in life. Learning to value all people, regardless of personality differences, learning to "speak their language", and serve their emotional and psychological needs, creates trust and high performance teamwork. As Dr. Taylor Hartman says, "Life is all about Relationships!"
This month alone we will be training over 350 teachers about how Motive Matters in relationships. We hope our time together will result in knowledge and understanding that will help these teachers learn to VALUE, RESPECT, and MOTIVATE their students in a new and powerful way, bringing out the very best in all.
Let's all continue, as Dr. W. Edwards Deming said, to have a "yearnin' for learnin'." Let's keep stretching, growing, extending ourselves, for our own personal growth, and for the growth and benefit of others.
Very best of living to all. GO TEAM!
Saturday, March 13, 2010
Hello everybody:)!!
Wow, it's been a while since I blogged. Tammy and I have been on a whirlwind of trainings.
The Valentine Retreat in Branson was absolutely wonderful. To all our friends who attended, we want you to know we will never forget the special time we enjoyed together. It was you who made it special. Everyone participated and shared. I wish we could have bottled that retreat, and offerred it to the entire world. Thank you to everyone! Special "Kudos" to Valery and Tammy and Stefany for all your hard work of preparation that paid off in improving relationships for all. You are the best "TEAM" ever!
For our corporate teams that we have been with in the last 8 weeks, you should know how proud we are of you. Your work of CSI, Continuous Self-Improvement has been an inspiration to us. You are doing a great job. Keep up the "work". Become your "Very Best!" Keep getting better, with the goal being to bring your gifts and strengths to help as many people as you can.
We arrived home last night from a trip to our nation's capitol. We had the priviledge of training a team from The Pentagon. This is a team that protects the people who protect "The People" of the United States of America, the greatest nation on earth.
With all the negativity in politics and government that is going on in our world, it was sooooooo refreshing to be with a team of people who do the work on the ground every day. Any company in the world would give their eye teeth to have a team like this one. The trust, commitment, loyalty, dedication, discipline, and team spirit they possess, serves as a model to the goodness and character derived from training and service in the military and policing professions. Kudos to each and every one of you on the "TEAM". Thank you for allowing us to serve you with training in Motive. Continue in being "Your Very Best!" Your service to the people of our nation, our children and grandchildren, is deeply appreciated.
I will close out this blog with this thought from our dear friend, the Author and Originator of "The Color Code/The People Code", Dr. Taylor Hartman. Your gifts are given, primarily, to benefit others. Being self-aware will help you use your strengths, and defy your limitations. The aim, in all we do, is to help you create and sustain successful relationships, so that your life, when it is all said and done, will benefit others, and yourself, to the greatest extent possible.
As he so often says, "Bring your gifts to bless the lives of others."
We love you all.
Van and Tammy
Wow, it's been a while since I blogged. Tammy and I have been on a whirlwind of trainings.
The Valentine Retreat in Branson was absolutely wonderful. To all our friends who attended, we want you to know we will never forget the special time we enjoyed together. It was you who made it special. Everyone participated and shared. I wish we could have bottled that retreat, and offerred it to the entire world. Thank you to everyone! Special "Kudos" to Valery and Tammy and Stefany for all your hard work of preparation that paid off in improving relationships for all. You are the best "TEAM" ever!
For our corporate teams that we have been with in the last 8 weeks, you should know how proud we are of you. Your work of CSI, Continuous Self-Improvement has been an inspiration to us. You are doing a great job. Keep up the "work". Become your "Very Best!" Keep getting better, with the goal being to bring your gifts and strengths to help as many people as you can.
We arrived home last night from a trip to our nation's capitol. We had the priviledge of training a team from The Pentagon. This is a team that protects the people who protect "The People" of the United States of America, the greatest nation on earth.
With all the negativity in politics and government that is going on in our world, it was sooooooo refreshing to be with a team of people who do the work on the ground every day. Any company in the world would give their eye teeth to have a team like this one. The trust, commitment, loyalty, dedication, discipline, and team spirit they possess, serves as a model to the goodness and character derived from training and service in the military and policing professions. Kudos to each and every one of you on the "TEAM". Thank you for allowing us to serve you with training in Motive. Continue in being "Your Very Best!" Your service to the people of our nation, our children and grandchildren, is deeply appreciated.
I will close out this blog with this thought from our dear friend, the Author and Originator of "The Color Code/The People Code", Dr. Taylor Hartman. Your gifts are given, primarily, to benefit others. Being self-aware will help you use your strengths, and defy your limitations. The aim, in all we do, is to help you create and sustain successful relationships, so that your life, when it is all said and done, will benefit others, and yourself, to the greatest extent possible.
As he so often says, "Bring your gifts to bless the lives of others."
We love you all.
Van and Tammy
Monday, January 11, 2010
Valentine Retreat in Branson!!!
This is going to be so much FUN!
A weekend retreat for couples in Branson, sponsored by The Miami Tribe of Oklahoma. This is your opportunity to attend a fantastic weekend that will strengthen your marriage for life. Because of the Tribe's sponsorship it is being made at a most affordable price for couples.
Color Code/Motive training sessions begin Saturday morning Feb. 13th, at 9:00 o'clock A.M., but you can come on friday evening and start the weekend off with some private time together. Take in a show, shop, or just hang out!
Lunch will be served Saturday and a scrumptious filet dinner in the evening. Mmmmm! Can't wait.
Reserve your spot today by clicking on the Billboard or the Miami Tribe of Oklahoma banner at http://www.motivematters.com/.
For questions or information email us at vanandtammy@msn.com or call Valery at 417-540-6019.
Space is limited, so make your reservations today.
We look forward to an unforgetable time together.
Van and Tammy Benson
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